Survive the Newborn Days!

I have been running new parent support groups for over fifteen years.  I love being there for the triumphs and even the tears.  I love to see these parents share their stories and support each other. I know, without a doubt, this work makes a difference.  But here is the thing that sucks,  support groups are great, but parents have to find them, travel to them and they are typically only weekly or less.  It is utter nonsense that we push new parents out the door of the hospital, with a 2 or 3 day old newborn, and leave them to fend for themselves.

It’s like a bad dystopian novel, “Survive The Newborn Days”.  You have six weeks to figure everything out about this tiny new human and who you are yourself, and as a couple, now that your entire world has been flipped upside down.  You have to do it completely on your own, sleep deprived, after likely completing the equivalent of an Iron Man triathlon and/or major surgery, and go back to everything you were doing before.   Ready?  GO!

How does that even make any sense? I know you have heard your friends speak of “barely surviving” the early weeks with a new baby.  Are you hoping for a different postpartum experience than this?  I want to let you in on a secret.  It does NOT have to be this way!  You can change the story of newborn parenting to one of joy, confidence and peace and it’s simple.  Line up nurturing care for yourself and your partner.  Ask your best friend to put a meal train together for you. Surround yourself with nurturing happy parents.  Ask for help with the day to day stuff, and be specific so you can focus on your baby, your family and yourself.  Ask a neighbor to walk your pup or utilize doggy daycare for their first few weeks postpartum.  Schedule weekly postpartum massages.  Hire professional support.

Professional support is a bit different than a family member or friend coming to help. Having a trusted resource you can reach out to anytime as you work to understand your new little one is invaluable. A trained and knowledgeable professional who offers support without judgement or opinions can be life changing.  Our society puts so much focus on birth and we ignore that after birth… there is a BABY!  I heard a wonderful women describe it as “focusing on the wedding instead of the marriage”.  I truly love how much families prepare for their birth experience, but there is more to bringing a human into the world than birth.  Investing in your postpartum weeks can allow you to enter parenthood nurtured and cared for.  It is known to reduce stress, increase confidence,  and may even reduce the risk of postpartum depression.  Here is the best part,  by changing your newborn parent story, you are helping our society as a whole!  If you are able to come through those early weeks feeling rested and cared for and in love, and you share with friends how and why you did it, other parents will feel more confident in asking for and hiring help.  You are a smart educated adult, I am sure you agree that planning for a supported, positive postpartum experience makes sense.

 

One thought on “Survive the Newborn Days!

  1. “A trained and knowledgeable professional who offers support without judgement or opinions can be life changing.” YES!!!! <3

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It was amazing to have a support system totally dedicated to me, especially during a long and difficult labor and delivery.Molly C. - Family Nurse Practitioner
The services that you provide are invaluable to new moms (and dads). I feel that your classes are as beneficial to my health as staying active and hydrated.Katie B.
Being a first time mom is the most elating and terrifying journey in the world. Having a guide who is educated and understanding like Paula definitely made a difference, especially during those first few weeks!Selina, Mother, Wife, and Teacher
Paula was amazing supporting me, my husband and our midwife. After our baby was born, Paula would check in at clutch times and ease our uncertainty.Sarah P. Operations Manager
Paula helped my partner to have the confidence to make informed decisions and be the best support he could be.Sarah M. Business Owner
Paula not only provided essential postpartum support, She was always available to answer questions or troubleshoot any concerns at any time.Sam W. Montessori Teacher
Paula's consistent support allowed me to breastfeed, recover, and spend time with my older child.Jenny B. SAHM
I wasn't sure how I would make it through those first few weeks with my son in the NICU. With Paula's help I was able to meet my needs and his, and eventually meet our goal of exclusively breastfeeding.Jill J. Special Education Teacher
"I'm so glad I hired a doula for my husband!"Regan S.
It's hard to imagine our journey without her knowledge and optimism reassuring us each step of the way.Chelsea M
it was clear our doula knew how to integrate seamlessly with the hospital birth team. My OB specifically mentioned how much she liked my doula during a follow up appointment.Tracy K.